Everyone remembers their teenage years. It happens to us in different ways and at different times yet they are frequently one of the most formative periods of our lives. Yet, teenagers are so often cast in a negative light, both by parents and teachers in schools. It is often when students lose their enthusiasm for learning at school and they take on a more rebellious stance which leads to all sorts of challenges which are often perceived as negative. Yet, when supported in the right way, the teenage years can be ones of great discovery, creativity and a period of transition towards developing an adult personality. For that reason and despite its challenges, I’ve always found it fascinating working with teenagers.
The Science behind teenage brains
There is so much to be discovered about human brains, including teenage brains yet there have been an important number of discoveries which help explain teenage behaviours. The brain actually reaches its biggest size as an early adolescent according to the National Institute of Mental Health, typically at 11 for girls and 14 for boys. The brain goes through a process of becoming more efficient, commonly referred to as pruning. Certain connections are strengthened whilst others are lost as they are seen as not useful and this process allows us to move towards more specialization. The rear part of the brain which controls visual, perceptual and motor skills is already well developed. Yet, the frontal part of the brain expands considerably from teen years into early adulthood and this is responsible for planning, thinking about consequences, controlling impulses and problem solving. This enables a significant expansion of skills.
Whilst the frontal part of the brain is still developing, teenagers tend to rely on a part of the brain called the amygdala to help them make decisions. This part of the brain is associated with emotions and instinct. These changes are truly amazing and offer a wealth of opportunities for establishing connections and learning yet they can feel somewhat overwhelming, which if not supported can lead to disruptions at home and school.
Opportunities
The challenges of teenagers are well known and documented so I’ve chosen to focus on the opportunities presented by these changes in the teenage brain.
Experiences, Memories: Daphna Shohamy, a Neuroscientist at Columbia University, has shown the advantages that the teenage brain has when connecting rewards and memories. Teen brains make powerful connections between these that enable them to learn from experiences in a more powerful way than adults do. Therefore, ensuring plenty of experiences and memories which are enriching will be hugely valuable. So much learning takes place outside of the classroom for teenagers, be it through extra-curricular activities, projects and trips. Ideally some of these should be as a family and some individually as teenagers are seeking to establish their own identity and interests.
Creativity: check any social media channel and you will see great evidence of teenage creativity. Sadly, schools often tend to crush creativity at this age through the cramming of knowledge and tests, which is a great shame. Teenagers should be encouraged to both engage with creative experiences such as art, music, theater but also supported in thinking creativity. Combine this with taking risks and they are onto a winner. So, instead of a powerpoint presentation at school why not display their findings through a short film, cartoon, game or dramatization.
Passions: this is the period in which people establish their passions and what they care about. Combining introducing new activities with developing depth in their current interests will have a significant life long impact. This is why I am so fond of the International Baccalaureate’s Creativity, Activity, Service (CAS) programme as it allows students to build their own learning journey to identify their passions and reflect on these experiences. Encourage teenagers to engage with social and environmental issues, and be part of making the world a better place.
Emotions: teenagers are starting to develop their understanding of both their own emotions, those of others and how they affect each other. Skills like empathy for others are starting to develop as the world becomes less about them. This is something we should celebrate and talk about! When given the opportunity, teenagers are often much better at expressing their emotions than adults are. Giving them the space to talk about this at home and school will really help to process all those changes and see meaning behind all these new experiences.
Supporting teenagers to overcome their challenges
Here are some of the challenges often encountered with teenagers and some suggestions for overcoming them.
Risk taking and rebellion: create opportunities for teenagers to take on risk within a safe context. Consider introducing them to an activity which embraces management of risk such as surfing or rock climbing. Openly discuss boundaries and the consequences of choices. Help teenagers find avenues for using their rebellious instincts for good causes, such as campaigning for a more sustainable world.
Social skills: teenagers attach huge importance on relationships and particularly those surrounding their friends. Find ways to support these friendships to develop and expand through shared activities, events and experiences. Try to avoid moving schools or countries during this period as it can be very unsettling.
Emotional instability: due to changes in the teenage brain, teenagers will naturally experience fluctuating emotions and can be erratic at times. Openly discuss these with them and help them to see beyond their immediate emotion. Ask them whether they want you to help them find a solution or simply listen. Being empathetic towards these emotions, no matter how absurd they may seem, is key. Openly discuss emotions and your feelings at home, including your own.
Problem solving: teenagers often seek instant rewards and struggle to structure their work. Support them in breaking down tasks into manageable steps. Help them to engage with critical thinking tasks, action planning and research through an area that really interests them. This will help them develop their passions and once they see success from the approach, it will reinforce their learning.
Sleep: Melatonin levels are different for teenagers, rising and falling later which results in them being lethargic in the morning. Due to the level of brain and body changes, teenagers need more sleep: 9-10 hours typically. Ideally, schools would start later but given this is rarely the case, openly discuss sleep with teenagers to establish good sleep routines and ensure that they are able to get at least 9 hours sleep on a regular basis. Managing screen use ahead of going to bed is critical - there is nothing worse to set you up for good sleep than the stress of social media on your phone. Do your best to establish sound family routines, including all eating dinner together and doing shared activities.
Resilience: show empathy towards their difficulties but also encourage them regarding their competence. Help them find ways to shine. Praise them and give them positive feedback which helps tap into the brain's reward circuits.
Conclusion
There is so much happening within a teenager’s world. I’d love to see these happenings be celebrated, openly discussed and understood to a greater extent. For so many teenagers around the world it is a time when they lose interest in school and learning which is a great shame. It is up to us, as parents and teachers, to support teenagers in finding their path, listen to them and develop practices which enable them to transition into happy and fulfilled adults.
Should you wish to explore how I can help your child with the transition towards the teen years through tailored coaching or mentoring, please do get in touch!
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